I walked in on an old Russian woman peeling onions

(not a dream:) I walked in on an old Russian woman peeling onions in the school kitchen. She was a little fat grandma in a bright pink shirt and her gigantic silver bowl must have had fifty onions in it. She said, "I not cry! Iss onions!" Never seen her before in my life, but she made me listen to a long boring story about her grandson but it was ok because of her accent. She kept insisting she was not really crying and I kept saying ok and she kept telling me some more. ... An old couple in the grocery store, both in work uniforms, hers a nurse's, his a mechanic's. They walked real slow behind the cart and took their time over the celery. I liked them already and then he slapped her on the ass and she giggled. ... Things I've learned from my boss this week: * black people are annoyingly difficult to tell apart * bananas keep best in the refrigerator * a child raised by two lesbians will always end up with behavior disorders and very fucked up * there are no nerves in the human ass.